A Philadelphia Union fan was driving down a country road when he came upon two New York Red Bulls fans hitch-hiking and told them to jump in the back of his pick-up truck. He then drove down the dirt road rather fast and lost control as they were going around a curve. The truck landed in a lake.
The Union fan scrambled to the surface and swam to shore. When he looked back at the lake, the two Red Bulls fans were still sitting in the bed of the truck, looking frantic.
As the truck began sinking, the Union fan yelled for the Red Bulls to get out, to which they replied, “We’re trying, but we can’t get the tailgate open!”
A recent Scottish immigrant attends his first baseball game in his new country and after a base hit he hears the fans roaring “Run! Run!” The next batter connects heavily with the ball and the Scotsman stands up and roars with the crowd in his thick accent: “R-r-run you bastard, r-run will you!” A third batter slams a hit and again the Scotsman, obviously pleased with his newfound knowledge of the game, screams “R-r-run you bastard, r-r-run will you!” The next batter held his swing at three and two and as the ump calls a walk the Scotsman stands up yelling “R-r-run you bastard, r-r-run!”
All the surrounding fans giggle quietly and he sits down confused. A friendly fan, sensing his embarrassment whisper, “He doesn’t have to run, he’s got four balls.”
After this explanation the Scotsman stands up in disbelief and screams, “Walk with pr-r-ride man! Walk with pr-r-ride!!!!”
We’re on the last pages of our joke book here, and the library is closed due to budget cuts. Please send us your favorite joke to avoidingthedrop|at|gmail|dot|com.
