Avoiding the Drop

Kenneth Di Vita Jensen

New England Revolution v. Chicago Fire S.C. (Saturday)

Impotent. That’s really the only word to describe the Revolution’s offense. While they dominated their midweek match against Toronto, they never really came close to scoring. The 0-0 draw leaves New England with 11 goals from 15 matches- dead last in all of MLS. The draw also leaves them with the third worst point total in the league- something tells me it’s not really going to matter if they sign a designated player or not. The Fire are almost as bad as the Revolution, they’ve also earned only 14 points, but they’ve done it in one less match. Fun Fact: He hasn’t played yet (he was an unused sub against Toronto), but the Revolution did sign winger Ryan Guy. Guy spent for very successful seasons with St. Patrick’s Athletic in Ireland, both domestically and in various European competitions.

Columbus Crew v. Houston Dynamo (Saturday)

There is still a long way to go in the 2011 MLS season, but give credit to both of these clubs, they’ve overcome early adversity and are still in the running for the Eastern Conference title. In Columbus’ case they lost three of their core players- Guillermo Barros Schelotto, Brian Carroll, and Frankie Hejduk- and are still tied on points for third place. Houston had to switch divisions and lost no less than nine players from their roster including starting goalkeeper Pat Onstad and midfielder Richard Mulrooney. Fun Fact: Houston’s yet-to-be-named soccer specific stadium will be open for the 2012 MLS season. Fun Fact: Since it opened in 1999 Columbus Crew stadium has drawn, on average, more fans per match than Blackpool F.C.’s Bloomfield Road. Take a moment and think about that…

FC Dinamo Moskva v. Non-Commercial Partnership Football Club Tom’ Tomsk (Saturday)

Speaking of Dynamos- or in this case Dinamos- the Moscow version hasn’t faired so well since the fall of communism and things don’t look to be getting better anytime soon- they’re in seventh place and falling. Tom’ Tomsk, conversely, have marched steadily up the Russian football pyramid since the fall of communism and have established themselves in the middle third of the Russian Premier League table for the past seven seasons. They also have the lone American in this match, Ukraine-born Yevgeni Starikov. Starikov has been in USMNT camps but has not yet been capped- what are you waiting for, Bob? Fun Fact: Dinamo began as the team of the Cheka, the Soviet secret police, so their lack of success in the last generation may be as simple as karmic chickens coming home to roost.

Atlético Nacional v. La Equidad (Saturday)

I don’t know a lot about football in Colombia, but I do know that a championship match featuring ten time champions Nacional against a team that only reached the top flight in 2007 (and was only founded in 1990!) is sure to have some interesting story lines. Perhaps the most interesting of these is that during league play this year La Equidad dominated the head-to-head matches. It’s also worth noting that neither of these clubs won the league- Nacional finished third and La Equidad finished fifth. La Equidad will also be without one of their best players, Panamanian international Gabriel Gómez who is currently at the Gold Cup- he scored the winner against the U.S.. Not So Fun Fact: Nacional’s manager is Santiago Escobar- the brother of murdered Colombian international Andres Escobar.

Mexico v. Guatemala (Saturday)

Who knew that so many players on El Tri suffered from asthma? It must be all of that smog in Mexico City- or they were trying to enhance their performance with clenbuterol, I’ll let you be the judge. The important fact in all of the controversy is that Chicharito was not among those suspended and his presence alone may be enough to overcome a plucky Guatemalan side. Guatemala, led by MLS’s Carlos Ruiz and Marco Pappa, were not expected to reach the quarterfinals so there is really no pressure on them and that might be just enough to give them a chance. That being said, I still see this match ending 3-1 for Mexico. Fun Fact: With starting goalkeeper Guillermo Ochoa among those suspended Mexico must choose between Alfredo Talavera (3 caps ) and Jonothan Orozco (1 cap).

Molde FK v. Sogndal Fotball (Sunday)

This match pits second place Molde against only-one-point-above-the-relegation-zone Sogndal. Sogndal’s back-up goalkeeper is American Joseph Bendik. Bendik sign with the club immediately after concluding his collegiate career at Clemson University. If he does get in the game he’ll likely face a few shots from Molde’s American midfielder Josh Gatt and they’ll both be watched from the bench by Molde’s 18 year old American defender Sean Cunningham. Fun Fact: Molde are managed by Ole Gunnar Solskjær. The mere act of typing his name just caused numerous Bayern Munich fans to call their local suicide prevention hotline. Fun Fact 2: If you’ve heard of any player at Sogndal it’s probably Eirik Bakke, who played for Leeds United for seven seasons earlier this decade.

USMNT v. Jamaica (Sunday)

This quarterfinal match fills me with dread. We all know that the Panama match was a disgrace, but was the match against Guadeloupe really any better? One goal against a non-FIFA opponent whose Elo ranking is more than 50 places below that of the U.S. is neither a “rebound” nor “progress.” Add that to the fact that they will be facing what is probably the best Jamaican side in a decade and I can’t say that I’ll be watching this match with anything approaching “confidence.” Fun Fact: Only three players on the Jamaican roster play their club football outside of Jamaica, Norway, or MLS. Fun Fact 2: By my count six players on the U.S. roster have yet to play in this tournament: Hahnemann, Rimando, Spector, Bornstein, Adu, and Rogers. Something tells me we won’t see them in this match either.

Mjøndalen IF v. Hønefoss BK (Sunday)

This week’s search for American’s plying their footballing trade in some of the world’s “less than glamorous” leagues brings us to the Adeccoligaen, the second tier of Norwegian football. Seventh place Mjøndalen have two Americans, defenders Kyle Helton (most recently with the PDL’s Austin Aztex) and Rhett Bernstein (most recently with Sevilla FC Puerto Rico of the USL Pro Division). Hønefoss, currently in a four-way tie for first place, have only one American, but he is their starting goalkeeper- Steve Clark. Clark joined Hønefoss from the Charleston Battery, also in the USL Pro Division. Fun Fact: 20 year old Hønefoss forward Kenneth Di Vita Jensen has played for Norway at several youth levels, but is also eligible to play for the United States through his American mother.