What you missed while mapping Mortimer’s Hole with lasers…
- Stevenage fans celebrated their shock 3-1 win over Newcastle by punching defender Scott Laird in the head.
- Blackburn striker El Hadji Diouf supposedly whispered “Fuck you and fuck your leg” into the ear of QPR winger Jamie Mackie as he lay on the ground after receiving a double leg break. The possibility that this was actually a proposition has been strangely unexplored.
- Michael Owen is unsurprised with Liverpool’s decline. Liverpool, presumably, is equally unsurprised with Michael Owen’s decline.
- Former Newcastle, Chelsea, and West Ham assistant Steve Clarke has joined Kenny Dalglish’s backroom staff at Liverpool; former Fulham assistant Mike Kelly’s departure from the club’s coaching staff is likely to be confirmed today.
- Fiorentina are looking to add Rangers striker Kenny Miller as a replacement for Adrian Mutu.
- David Beckham’s one-month training spell at Tottenham starts today; Beckham’s loan deal fell through when Spurs refused to meet the Galaxy’s contract demands.
- Real Madrid are interested in making a move for Gareth Bale.
- Udinese winger Alexis Sanchez is interested in making a switch to the Premier League.
- Edson Buddle has signed with 2.Bundelsiga side FC Ingolstadt. This is the second time in two ALNs that FC Ingolstadt has come up.
- England will play a
completely meaningless game that will result in the injury of someone who’s desperately needed by their clubfriendly against Ghana in March. - Singapore’s national team is so bad that they’re thinking about disbanding. Your move, Vanuatu.
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Adu AND Buddle? The rest of the 2.Bundesliga better watch out – it’s Ingolstadt Time!
They’re a Heath Pearce and a Jonathan Bornstein away from…something, I’m sure.