What you missed while trying to translate “mamihlapinatapei” from Yagan into English…
- English Premier League roundup: Bolton 4-2 Tottenham, Birmingham 2-2 West Ham, Blackburn 2-1 Wigan, Blackpool 2-2 Everton, Fulham 1-1 Aston Villa, Manchester United 2-1 Wolves, Sunderland 2-0 Stoke City, Arsenal 0-1 Newcastle, West Brom 0-2 Manchester City, Liverpool 2-0 Chelsea.
- MLS Playoff roundup: Columbus 2-1 Colorado (Colorado advances on penalties), Real Salt Lake 1-1 FC Dallas (FC Dallas wins 3-2 on aggregate), Los Angeles 2-1 Seattle (L.A. wins 3-1 on aggregate).
- Fernando Torres scored both of Liverpool’s goals against Chelsea, which of COURSE means that he’s back to the very best he’s ever been in the history of ever.
- Manchester United midfielder Owen Hargreaves returned from a two-year injury layoff only to be subbed off after six minutes with a new hamstring injury; Sir Alex is saying that the new injury could take four weeks to rehab, and also that Hargreaves may have had an anxiety attack. I’m not sure if that’s an “either/or” situation.
- Wolves keeper and American international Marcus Hahnemann may return to MLS after his contract expires this summer.
- Newcastle striker Andy Carroll could be in line for an England call-up after scoring the lone goal in Newcastle’s 1-0 win over Arsenal.
- While we’re on the subject of Andy Carroll, it’s alleged that he may have celebrated the 5-1 win over Sunderland last week with hookers and blow back at Kevin Nolan’s place.
- Arsene Wenger is requesting privacy after The Sun alleged that he’s engaged in an affair with a French singer.
- Stoke manager Tony Pulis has responded to the slate of bad calls against his club by calling for a referee relegation system that will punish bad officials.
- Cristiano Ronaldo won a “substantial” libel payout against the Telegraph after they printed a piece in July of 2008 alleging that he risked an ankle injury by spending all night dancing with Hollywood models.
- If both AFC Wimbledon and MK Dons win their FA Cup replays, they’ll be pitted against each other for the first time since MK Dons left Wimbledon in 2002.
- Real Madrid maintained their spot atop the La Liga table with a 2-0 derby win over Atletico Madrid.
- Lazio’s lead at the top of Serie A’s table was cut to two points after a 2-0 derby loss to Roma over the weekend.
- Inter Milan may have lost defender Walter Samuel for the season to a cruciate ligament tear.
- Juventus would like everyone to know that just because Gianlugi Buffon missed a team picture does not mean that he’s going to Manchester United this January.
- Porto beat Benfica 5-0 in Portugal’s “classico”.
- Malmo won their 16th Swedish title with a 2-0 win over Mjallby.
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Hargreaves case is probably the saddest one, ever. Anxiety attack? I’d have one too. I’m sure what was running through his head was something like, “Not again.”
MK Dons v AFC Dons. That would be a fun little affair. I’ll never forget when they moved to MK and all before/after. Be nice to see AFC Dons and FC United make a good push in the Cup.
I keep waiting for Andy Carroll to go apeshit and bite a ref’s ear off. Seriously, I think that boy is Joey Barton unstable.
Good performance from Becks last night for LA. Did anyone inform Seattle a game was being played last night? They didn’t show up until late and then too late.
Interestingly, Joey Barton doesn’t appear to be Joey Barton unstable any more.
As much as their cars cost and as cheap as flammable materials are, it would behoove them to be on their best behavior. Of course, wasn’t it Demarcus Beasley who was at Rangers and had his car torched by some twat? And he’d not done anything wrong, that I’m aware of. Good times.