Avoiding the Drop

Steve Bruce wants Becks' phone number

England makes my head hurt.

Yeah, you read that right.  England gives me agita, makes me crazy, never changes.

Some background and context is in order, yes?  Yes.  England is a nation that thrives on water-cooler talk, that thrives on gossip, that thrives on talking points.  It’s a nation fueled by tabloids and less-than-reputable journalism.  It has no ability whatsoever to rein in the fervor for shredding it’s celebrities, politicians, sporting figures or royal family.  England likes to get in the muck, despite it’s protestations to the contrary.

Some more facts.  Certainly you had been aware that England’s national soccer team, under the thumb of our new overlord Don Fabio Capello, had qualified for the World Cup with (shocking) relative ease.  Capello had taken over, installed discipline and a sense of hunger in a team that desperately needed both.  He is a legitimate professional.  If he produces a major result at the World Cup next Summer, he will be an English legend (despite being Italian, but, hey, everyone loves the old bangers-and-mash, right?!).

Last weekend, England had a meaningless (for them) World Cup qualifier at the Ukraine.  It was the only match in the series of 10 qualifiers that England would lose, tanking and playing poorly in a 1-0 loss.  This match was only available to the viewing public in England via an internet stream (that was unavailable here, by the way).  Fine, whatever, it was good to see that Capello needed to keep the team motivated and fresh.  Ukraine had been desperate, the atmosphere was electric (and a bit dangerous), the ref kicked out starting keeper Robert Green.  You get the picture.

The reaction was swift and predictable.  The papers slated the team, asked if Capello was able to cope with tough conditions, asked if he was able to truly motivate.  Typical head-shaking stuff, but it sells papers.  Fast forward to Wednesday, and the final date in the qualifiers, this time a true friendly with Belarus.  The Belarussians had been eliminated from qualifying early on, and so this match literally could have been played with 6 subs each, 7 asides, keepy-uppy, you name it.  It was truly meaningless, other than to see if Capello would crack the whip.  He clearly had.

The match was actually on television here (gee, thanks PPV companies who graciously allowed the ex-pats to FINALLY see their team without coughing up 25$ for a match) and so I was able to catch it.  England looked decent, not world-beating, but good enough to see off a Belarus team who clearly were only in London for it’s fine selection of lagers.  Tottenham Hotspur striker Peter Crouch scored first for England, and capped off the night with a second goal.  He had a match worthy of top marks, top honours and top praise from the journos.  Steve Bruce, working for ITV (a British network covering the match) decided that Crouchy’s two-goal effort was minimal, not worthy of praise, and as their guest pundit, said it wasn’t worthy of Man of the Match.

Man of the Match is a big deal in England.  I have no idea why at this point because statistics and graphics often prove that less flashier players outwork and outpass the bigger names, but there it is.  Bruce was the guest pundit and it came down to him to choose.  In a meaningless match, Crouchy clearly had done enough to earn the honour.  No, no, Bruce says.  It’s David Beckham.

Wait.  What?

David Beckham of the Los Angeles Galaxy.  He of the 32 minute performance.  He of the pass that set up England’s second goal, scored by Shaun Wright-Phillips and virtually nothing else.  That David Beckham.

It’s a meaningless match.  A well-loved and well-respected striker had scored two impressive goals and played well.  An aging and over-rated midfielder had come on for a 30 minute cameo and really didn’t do much other than one assist.  Bruce chooses the mid-fielder.  As mind-boggling as that was, Bruce’s decision has received SO much coverage and press and discussion that it’s become a national talking point into the weekend, which sees club football return in all it’s glory.  Front page stories on every tabloid and website dominate.  Amazing doesn’t begin to describe it.

And that’s why England makes my head hurt.

Television below, all times EDT, courtesy of my man, Jamie Trecker of Fox Soccer.

SATURDAY
Aston Villa v Chelsea 0730    ESPN2
Stuttgart vs Schalke        0925    ESPN Deportes
Freibrug v Bayern Munich    0930    GolTV
Sunderland v Liverpool    1000    FSC
Man U v Bolton        1000    Setanta
Arsenal v B’ham 1000    Setanta X (SDD Setanta 2030)
Portsmouth v Spurs        1000    FSE
Blackpool v Plymouth    1000    ESPN360
Stoke v West Ham        1000    stream only
Everton v Wolves        1000    stream only (SDD Setanta 2215)
Deportivo La Coruna vs Sevilla 1155, ESPN Deportes
Forest v Newcastle        1200    Setanta
Juventus v Fiorentina 1200    FSC/RAI
Hamburg v Leverkusen    1230    GolTV
Twente vs AZ             1340 ESPN360
Real Madrid v Valladolid    1400    ESPN360/ESPND
Impact v Whitecaps        1430    FSC
Genoa v Inter            1440    FSE/RAI
PSV v Heerenveen        1445    ESPN360
Lille v Rennes            1500    Setanta
Valencia v Barcelona        1600    GolTV
TFC v RSL 1600    CBC/DK
Monterrey v Jaguares        1755    Telemundo
Revs v Fire 1800    FSC
Cruz Azul v Tecos        1800    Azteca
Toluca v Tigres        1955    Telemundo
DC v Crew            2000    DK
Indios v Atlante        2000    Azteca/ESPND
KCW v Seattle 2030    DK
FCD v Colorado        2030    DK
Atlas v Queretaro        2145    Telemundo
San Luis v Pumas        2200    Telefutura
Monarcas vs Pachuca        2300  (SDD Azteca America)

Enjoy the return of club football and talk about all the matches, results and managerial meltdowns (in addition to Torres and Gerrard, news comes this morning that Javier Mascherano might have a knock as well) in comments.  I’ll be on Twitter this morning, out for a bit this afternoon, then back tonight.  Adam and Mags are also on Twitter, and Fuse enjoys his quiet solitude away from all this social media madness.

Oh, and do me one more favor, will you?  Please click on our links to the right and show these folks some love.  We have some fantastic friends and colleagues and I’d suggest they are all required reading.  Okay, that’s enough.  Time for some football.